


Of Gifts and Love

by romantichopelessly



Series: Bracelet Verse [1]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders Needs a Hug, Friendship, Growth, M/M, Patton loves hugs, Platonic or Romantic Moxiety, anxiety attack mention, deceit mention, dynamicest duo, moxiety - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-19
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-09-22 14:33:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17061557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/romantichopelessly/pseuds/romantichopelessly
Summary: Virgil used to make simple bracelets to help him through anxiety attacks before he was accepted by the others. After being accepted, Virgil begins giving some of these bracelets to a certain fatherly side, receiving the most precious gifts of all in return. Hugs. For touch starved Virgil, that's everything.





	Of Gifts and Love

The first time that it happened was actually before Anxiety was truly ‘accepted’ by the others.

Virgil did not consider himself to be an artistic person by any means. At the time, he did not think much of himself at all, beyond what he had to do for Thomas and how that isolated him from his fellow sides.

It did not start out as a hobby, or even something that was particularly enjoyable for the dark aspect. He only began making the bracelets because the repetitive motion of the knot tying calmed him down after an anxiety attack.

When he had begun making the little bracelets, he had not even intended for anyone to see them. They were just a coping mechanism after all. They weren’t even very good. In fact, if it weren’t for Patton and Virgil’s own guilt complex, he doubted that anyone would have ever found out about them at all.

Not that Virgil felt as if he had done anything to Patton in particular that he had to be guilty about, but it seemed as if the more the moral side was nice to him, the more Virgil found himself wanting to repay him in some way.

That way just happened to lead to Virgil standing in the doorway leading to the kitchen in the mind palace just after they had finished filming “Making Some Changes”, a small strip of interwoven threads clutched tightly in his fingers. He watched nervously as Patton moved happily about the kitchen, humming softly to himself.

Taking a deep breath and steeling himself, Anxiety gingerly stepped into the room and figuratively into Morality’s territory. “Um… Patton..?” He cringed slightly at the wavering tone that his voice took, suddenly wishing to be anywhere but where he was.

But no. He had to do this. He had to do something to show Patton how much his… friendship… meant to him. And this was all that he had to offer. Because he wasn’t talented, he didn’t have anything to give _any_ of them, he was just a _disease_ -

Virgil’s self deprecating inner monologue was quickly cut off as Patton turned around with a wide smile on his face.

“Anxiety! Hiya, kiddo! What’s up?” Patton’s tone was light, happiness practically radiating off of the emotional side. It calmed Virgil somewhat. No matter what he thought of himself, Patton had always treated him just like he did the other two.

Virgil cleared his throat as Patton stepped away from the cookie dough that he had been stirring to turn his full attention to Virgil. “Well..” He averted his eyes from Patton’s deep chocolate brown, focusing instead on a point just over his shoulder. Apparently his hours of practicing in his room meant absolutely nothing as the words stuck uncomfortably in Virgil’s throat. “I wanted to…” Frustrated, his grip on the simple gift tightened. His next words came out quickly, almost gruffly. “I wanted to thank you. For, you know, being a good friend and not turning me into another person or whatever. So… just- here.”

Patton’s eyes widened as Virgil thrust whatever it was that he was holding into his chest, his hands scrambling to catch the small item before it fell to the ground as Virgil pulled back just as abruptly. Carefully, Patton opened his fist, revealing a thin, homemade bracelet. It was simple, with alternating stripes of light gray and bright blue thread.

Patton’s colors.

Virgil watched Patton with thinly veiled anxiety. He knew that the little bracelet was not much. It was not nearly as much as Patton deserved for not only putting up with Virgil, but also making attempt after attempt to make him feel welcome. The longer that Patton was silent, staring at the bracelet in his palm, the antsier Virgil got.

He was just about to say something and book it out of there when he noticed the tears welling in the corners of Patton’s eyes. 

Eyes widening, Virgil held his hands up in surrender. “Patton, I- I know it’s not much, it was stupid, I-” Virgil’s words were instantly cut off as a pair of arms wrapped around his shoulders.

Virgil froze, all thoughts halting as Patton hugged him. He barely registered the soft sniffles coming from the other as he focused on the warm, overwhelming feeling of the hug that he was receiving. Just as he was about to relax into the comfort of Patton, however, he was pulling away, his eyes still watery, but a huge smile lighting up his freckled face.

“Kiddo! This is just- It’s just perfect.” Patton’s smile grew as the noticed the slight pink hue growing on Virgil’s cheeks. “And of course you’re welcome. Now, why don’t you help me tie it on! I’m never gonna brace _let_ it out of my sight!” Patton giggled, holding out his left wrist and the bracelet. “And then you can help me with these cookies!” He exclaimed as Virgil began to carefully tie the bracelet around Patton’s wrist.

That night, Virgil didn’t sleep, his mind far too preoccupied with trying to mentally recreate the feeling of his friend’s arms around him. Turning over in his bed and clutching his pillow to his chest, Virgil knew one thing.

He had to get Patton to hug him again.

\----

The second time it happened was much later.

Virgil didn’t have much of a chance to make anything for Patton when he was stepping back from the videos, his job, and Thomas. Once the others came to get him, everything changed, and Virgil had to adjust to a new life where Thomas, Logan and Roman not only now knew his name, but all accepted him as an essential part of Thomas.

So, all in all, Virgil stopped making the bracelets, and went without physical contact of any sort for a while. Which would have been fine, if Virgil had been able to stop thinking about that single hug.

It turned out that less frequent anxiety attacks meant less need for a distracting activity like making bracelets. However, the closer that Virgil found himself growing with Roman and Logan, the more Virgil craved their casual sort of intimacy. Specifically with Patton.

So Virgil took his previous coping mechanism and turned it into a hobby. He began making the bands on good days. Sitting in his room, feeling content, Virgil would weave together the threads expertly, learning new techniques and patterns and trying out different colors. Roman even noticed Virgil’s new activity, and gifted him a box overflowing with brightly colored new threads, beads, and other jewelry making tools.

Virgil appreciated the gift, even if he knew that it was mostly fueled by guilt.

Of course, Virgil didn’t give his first attempts to Patton. No, his experiments were either quickly trashed or used for himself. If when he finally gave another bracelet to the bright side, it would have to be perfect, and it would have to be for good reason.

Virgil couldn’t allow himself to give Patton a gift just for his own selfish touch starved reasons.

So Virgil waited. And practiced. And waited some more.

His chance came after the next video. He found himself marveling at how at peace Patton had looked, wrapped in his Hufflepuff merchandise, his smile bright and sunshiny. As soon as Patton asked if they could wear the Hogwarts stuff and the new outfits full time, Virgil knew exactly what he was going to do.

His suddenly replenished sentimentality had nothing to do with Patton’s reaction to his new jacket. Absolutely nothing.

The new bracelet didn’t even take an hour to make, Virgil was working with such focus. It was more complicated than the first, with a diamond like pattern make of bright yellow and black thread. Without even giving himself time to think, Virgil was out his door and heading towards Patton’s room, holding the new bracelet carefully. He wasted no time in knocking on Patton’s door, his anxiety only appearing as the door remained closed, no sound to be heard on the other side.

Patton’s door was always open. Always. Or at least, if it was closed, it always took the moral side less than a minute to answer it. As Virgil stood there in front of the silent door, he began to twist and untwist the bracelet around his finger. Where was Patton? Was something wrong? Was this a bad time to bring another gift- of course it was, he shouldn’t even be here-

Suddenly the door was pulled open a crack, Patton’s face peeking out. “Yeah, kiddo? Did you need something?”

Virgil, though filled with relief at seeing Patton open the door unharmed, felt a pit of worry growing in the bottom of his stomach. There was something off here. Patton’s voice was wavering ever so slightly, his usual light tone just barely off the mark. Virgil could feel the hairs on the back of his neck rising as he noticed the slight redness around Patton’s eyes and the tip of his nose.

“Pat? Are you okay?” Virgil asked, momentarily forgetting his reason for being there.

“Yeah! I’m great, Virge!” Patton’s smile widened, and Virgil tried to unsee the brittle edges of that smile. “I’m just a peachy Patton! Is there something I can help you with?”

Virgil hesitated, wavering between asking again if something was wrong and just doing what he came here to do. Biting his lip, Virgil settled on the latter.

He trusted Patton to tell him if he really needed anything.

Tentatively, Virgil held out the yellow and black bracelet, his other hand stuffed in his hoodie pocket, plucking on a loose thread. “I.. I just made you another thing. Because you can’t wear all the Harry Potter stuff. It’s Hufflepuff. So… yeah…” Virgil trailed off, wishing that he had scripted something to say rather than trying to wing it like this.

This time, when Patton’s eyes filled with tears, Virgil wasn’t as shocked. He was surprised even more by how quickly he was pulled in for a tight hug. Patton squeezed him like a lifeline, and Virgil shivered at the long craved contact. He was just about to wrap his arms around Patton’s middle when the other spoke, his voice muffled, buried in Virgil’s shoulder.

“It’s perfect, Virgil. I love it. Thank you.” And then Patton was pulling back, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand. He took the bracelet that Virgil was still holding out and stepped back into his room, the tiniest, thankfully genuine, smile on his face.

Virgil decided to count his blessings and get out of there while he was ahead. It was obvious that Patton had something that he wanted to attend to in his room anyway. Stepping back as well, Virgil shoved his hand back into his pocket and nodded, giving Patton a half smile in response. “You’re welcome.”

\----

After that, the bracelet giving became more and more frequent.

Virgil couldn’t quite shake what he had seen with Patton in his room. Obviously he was bound to worry- he worried about all of them, he was Anxiety- but for whatever reason, Patton’s odd behavior stuck with him and nagged at him in the back of the mind for days.

His worries were resolved after the next few videos, though.

Or, they weren’t resolved, because Virgil would never be able to rest knowing that Patton was in actual turmoil and didn’t think that he could tell anyone, but at least his worries were validated.

It honestly didn’t feel any better.

It certainly didn’t help that he was the only one that hadn’t given Patton a gift after the whole ordeal, either. Even Logan had given something to Patton, though it was more of an apology gift than anything.

As soon as he could, Virgil began his new project. This bracelet was a bit more intricate than the last two. It had three colors instead of the usual two, red, purple and dark blue, with a charm in the shape of a puppy hanging in the middle. It wasn’t much, not compared to real conjured puppy, or a brand new hoodie, but Virgil knew somehow that Patton would appreciate it nevertheless.

He was correct. When Virgil gave the new bracelet to Patton, he was greeted with yet another warm hug. There were no tears this time, only a soft, genuine smile and a real light in Patton’s eyes that lifted Virgil’s spirits more than any bigger or flashier gift ever could have. Virgil almost allowed himself to hug back that time, but found himself frozen in Patton’s arms as a simple, “I love you, you adorable little muffin,” was whispered into the fabric of his hoodie.

Those words spurred Virgil into a new frenzy.

He sped up his pace, making more and more bracelets for the moral side, each unique in pattern, color, charms and beads.

A red and green bracelet for Christmas.

A light purple one for the time Patton helped him through an anxiety attack.

A green and orange one with a ‘P’ charm for Patton’s birthday.

A pink and red one that was a bit messy post Patton’s return after Deceit’s trick.

A black and white one with the words “Dynamicest Duo” threaded into it.

Each one was met with a much welcomed hug and thanks, and Virgil found that he couldn’t get enough.

However, the others were beginning to notice. Roman had outright asked about the menagerie of handmade bracelets decorating Patton’s arms, and Virgil had only barely managed to avoid answering his rather persistent questions. Logan hadn’t said anything to Virgil directly, but he could see the pointed looks and calculated glances that he sent Virgil and the jewelry. And although Patton never said anything, Virgil was sure that he was catching on as well.

The thought terrified the anxious side. It wasn’t as if any of them would be mad at him if he explained his reasoning. Making gifts for a person in seek of getting a hug wasn’t exactly a dastardly plan, though he didn’t doubt that a year and a half ago Roman would have been able to make it look as if it was.

Nevertheless, admitting how much he cared about Patton and craved his soft touch scared Virgil to no end. Though, try as he might, Virgil couldn’t see a way out of admitting it. It was either stop giving Patton the bracelets at all and risk a complete lack of hugs for the foreseeable future, or admit his true intentions and risk a few awkward moments.

He knew that it likely wouldn’t be more than that. Patton was understanding and loved that mushy stuff.

Right?

That’s what Virgil told himself, over and over again as he stood in front of Patton’s door once again, his hand poised to knock. He was just edging on his third minute of standing still and staring at the door when it swung open before him to reveal Patton, his eyes wide with surprise.

“Virgil! I… I wasn’t expecting you to be here.” Virgil straightened up as Patton opened the door fully, a smile falling over his features as the shock wore off. “What’s up, b- buddy?” The nickname was awkward, the two of them still adjusting to Virgil’s more vocal discomfort with the innocent nicknames.

It may be a bit bumbling for a while, but Virgil was beyond glad that he had spoken up. It was important to him that Patton see him as an equal, and not a little angel.

Taking a deep breath, Virgil let himself relax. Patton was trying to respect him in the way that he needed and the two were closer than ever before. This would be okay. 

Gently, Virgil pulled a dark purple and black bracelet from his pocket, looking up to meet Patton’s eyes before he spoke. “I made you another one.” He could see the light growing in Patton’s eyes so he held up a finger before the other could talk. “I should… probably confess something first. I’ve been making these, yeah, because you’re a good friend, but I- I also-”

 

Patton reached out and carefully lowered Virgil’s finger, his eyes kind and deep. “You want a hug?”

Virgil’s cheeks instantly flamed red, his eyes widening. “Wh- I- How did you know that I-”

Patton giggled, taking the bracelet from Virgil’s other hand. “I’m not as oblivious as Logan thinks I am, Virge.”

“I know that, I just…”

“You thought you were being sneaky.” Patton smiled, opening his arms. “But you don’t have to ask to get a hug.”

Virgil only hesitated for a second before stepping forward and into Patton’s arms. It was warm and comforting like always, like coming home. He was just nestling into the hug when Patton spoke again.

“I love you, V.”

“...I love you too, Pat.” And Virgil finally wrapped his arms around Patton’s middle and hugged him back.


End file.
